


You Can Hear it in the Silence

by nazyalenskyism



Category: Nikolai Series - Leigh Bardugo, The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: F/M, and they're peak zoyalai to me, just a short fic thing, these lyrics have just been stuck in my head, they are in love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-29
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:53:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26721691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nazyalenskyism/pseuds/nazyalenskyism
Summary: A short fic based on some lyrics from the song 'You are In Love.'
Relationships: Nikolai Lantsov/Zoya Nazyalensky
Kudos: 32





	You Can Hear it in the Silence

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is myruthlesszoya.tumblr.com, if you ever want to talk or send in prompts or anything <3

_**One night he wakes, strange look on his face  
Pauses, then says, you're my best friend  
And you knew what it was, he is in love** _

Zoya awoke with a sharp jab to her ribs, her mind reeling as she flung an arm out feeling around for the perpetrator. “What is it?” she hissed, her eyes adjusting to the dark. This was not an unusual situation, but she needed to assess it as quickly as she could so she could see if she needed to jump to action or not. The nuisance who shared her bed remained quiet as Zoya tried to figure out if he was still asleep or not. 

“Ouch,” was all she heard as her arm made contact with the chest next to her. She let her shoulders relax, if he was speaking, then he was awake, and had probably just woken up on his own. Still, she had to see what was wrong. She rolled onto her side, propping her head on her palm, elbow bent. 

“What’s wrong?” she whispered as he blinked the sleep from his eyes. He pushed himself up onto his own side, his position mimicking hers. His brows were drawn together, his expression almost comical as he turned towards her voice, “is everything okay?” 

He opened his mouth about to speak, pausing as a smile wound its way up his face. She glared at him this time, snapping her fingers in his face, willing him to tell her what it was. Usually when he woke up suddenly in the middle of the night, he was either turning into a smoke-winged demon or shaking from nightmares of wars that had long since ended but lived forever in his mind. 

“You’re my best friend,” he said simply, and despite the darkness of the night she could practically see the twinkle in his eyes. “You’re my best friend,” he repeated, nodding once, as if that confirmed it.

_‘Oh’_ she thought. _‘Oh.’_ She felt the full force of the meaning behind his words. She didn’t find it particularly easy to say those three words. They came so easily to him, he would throw them out with an ease she wished she could reciprocate, but she couldn’t articulate them to the people she knew she cared for in that way. And she didn’t like hearing them from other people, because she was unable to say them back, and when people said that phrase, they wanted to hear it back, he knew that as well as she did. So he’d given her something else. He’d encapsulated the meaning of that phrase in another, letting her know what he felt, what he wanted to say, without pressuring her to do the same. _‘He is in love.’_

For a moment, she felt a wave of sentiment pass over her, no one had taken care to consider what it meant for her to be able to express her emotions, without having to say _‘I love you.’_ Nikolai was an expert at this, tailoring his actions, making himself into something, someone else for whomever was watching. But she knew that this was genuine, he was never anything but genuine with her, they were not in the habit of keeping secrets from one another. She fought to push the beginnings of a smile off of her face, _‘damn him,’_ he was always doing this, making her smile like a giddy girl. She rolled her eyes in an attempt to appear unaffected, but she knew Nikolai had guessed her reaction before he’d even said the words. Saints, he was going to be insufferable now. 

“No, really?” she said with mock surprise, “I always thought your best friend was your finance minister, or maybe the Kerch ambassador.” 

Nikolai leaned back against the headboard, “nope,” he said, smiling lazily, “it’s all you Nazyalensky.” A coy wink was tossed her way, and she considered smothering him with his own pillow. 

“Go back to bed,” she huffed instead, tossing her hair over her shoulder and slipping back under the covers. When she saw him grinning down at her, she let out an exasperated breath and flipped over to her other side. Finally, some peace and quiet. She felt the mattress shift as he settled back into place. Good. She had enough to think about without him goading her on top of it all. Her eyes began to shut as sleep welcomed her once more. A warm arm wrapped around her waist, drawing her in close, and she let herself fall back as she heard his words echo in the silence of the night.


End file.
